Yesterday, a question on Formspring asked me what my personality is like. I wanted to simply answer ‘typical Gemini’ but then, people would simply assume I’m a vague nut who believes in silly things. Which in itself is a good description of my personality by it isn’t really what I was aiming for.
I’m an introverted extrovert
On one end of the spectrum I’m a shelled up introvert which is what most people in school’s impression of me of. My brain would efficiently only think about important stressful matters like studies and my future and everything in between. ‘friends’ become less important. In school, my peers would call me the most ‘chill’ person there because it seems like I’m never worried. But the thing is, I’ve simply mastered this skill (or rather adopted a habit) where I don’t express unnecessary emotions where it needn’t be expressed so I’m left seeming apathetic and melancholic (like Kristen Stewart’s acting in every movie) In a sense I become less human and more robot which is fitting for mundane school life (im rational that way).
In my inner extrovert skin I play a totally different ball game. I become increasingly impulsive and careless and I would throw caution to the wind about what others think of me. A creative switch inside of me would suddenly click and I’ll be a mother-fucking lyrical wordplay genius and my brain would start churning random facts and nonsense questions like it was butter. Dancing and singing would become second nature and the importance of my past and future would diminish fast.
The fact that I have two different personalities is not surprising since I’m a Gemini (the twins). And it doesn’t take much to switch between the two. My introvert self will always show itself when I fall into a boring mundane routine (such as school) or when I’m tired. My extrovert self however will always show when I’m energetic or having a change of pace in life like travelling or meeting people at a party. basically when I’m having fun.
Don’t get me wrong. I like both my personalities, my introvert self is the reason I know as much as I do and it’ll help me succeed in life but he’s a boring party pooper. My extrovert self however is a relief to be sometimes and is so much more fun being. I am learning to fill the gap between the two though by smiling more when im introverted and shutting up more when im extroverted.
maybe I should name my personalities. I’ll go by Fahmii when I’m fun and I’ll be Suwadi when im being lame. Just like when I used to use Suwadi as my name when I would get into trouble. I think I should go now. If you’re looking for me I’ll be at the mental asylum for nutcases.