The art of LIFTING THE DAMN SEAT UP

You know what i dislike? Guys who dont deserve dicks.

I mean seriously, is it soo hard to lift the toilet seat up when you pee? Do you know there is a urinal? oh what was that? youre embarrassed people will stare at youre willy? oh okay. that makes sense. Oh but wait, is your instrument really that small that you cant even aim properly??

I mean come on guys, if youre that embarrassed to use the urinal, can you at least lift up the toilet seat? I dont pee on your ass do i?

Okay, for those of you who dont know, well, mostly girls, sometimes you wonder why the male toilet smells like piss all the time. Its pretty simple but not really that well known especially by girls since no one dares telling you when you were a kid. So anyway, the reason is threefold.

Firstly, Guys can pee standing up, woot woot! rocks to be us! but hey, just because boys can pee standing up doesnt mean all boys can AIM. some boys are either unable to aim or just plain suck. Maybe its like trying to grab hold of a turtle’s neck or maybe its like gripping a firehose. I dont know. They just suck at it.

Secondly, ALOT of boys are too lazy to lift up the toilet seat when they take a piss meaning some boys are so considerate that they leave behind little bits of golden treasures for the next person to find. How sweet.

Thirdly, Some boys just dont really give a damn. They have that mental idea that ‘I am a man! meaning i can pee wherever i want whenever i want’ but seriously, by the looks of it, you just grew pubic hair and youre calling yourself a man.. get real.

These boys are found all around the world and have pissed off (pun intended :P) tons of guys at it but you know what, most guys leave the toilet forgetting all about it. haha. its true. Thats why you dont hear about the topic that much.

My theory is, guys do get soo majorly pissed off that they have to sanitize the seat before they can use it and i always feel like posting one of those passive aggressive notes that goes something like ‘Come closer. Your papa John isnt as long as you think’ but then when we actually do do what we came to do, that amazing gush of relief that follows is usually enough to rid you of any recent anger or rage.

Leaving the toilet, we forget all about it as though it never happenned. Though our mouths might not tell you, the smell though, it tells its own story.

-vuxpyra//

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